Sitemap - 2021 - The Olognion

Leak confirms Kubernetes team using Bash scripts for own deploys

Cryptocurrency people successfully ruin words 'crypto' and 'web', seek next target

Dev realizes he is still in the interview stage after 2 years of work

Dev builds perfect note-taking system which only stores info about building note-taking systems

Startup raises $480M of VC money in order to fire all native app developers and switch to ElectronJS

Dev stops suffering from imposter syndrome after realizing he is in fact dumb

Dev builds powerful blogging setup, suddenly realizes he hates writing

Corporate leaks show that Satan still owes over $400k to Facebook for consulting services

AI solves all political, economic and medical problems after parsing Hacker News comments

PlayStation 6 rumored to be able to render seven web pages at 30fps simultaneously

Research: heavy drug users actually understand JavaScript type coercion rules

Dev surprised his perfect vim/tmux/bash/xmonad setup doesn't alleviate existential crisis

Major AI breakthrough: YouTube will stop suggesting that one video you've been ignoring since 2011

Dev becomes rich by stopping buying domain names for never materialized side projects

Dev recovered from COVID now prefers Material Design due to permanent loss of taste

Volkswagen's electric car allegedly switches on hidden diesel engine when nobody's looking

Developer says he can fix the Suez canal problem by adding more containers onto the ship

Facebook acquires Somalia to escape regulations, renames country to Zuckerbergstan

Programmer invents non-moving car, claims "premature optimization is the root of all evil"

Client-side JS surpasses porn in global traffic stats

Google employees can't pass CAPTCHA asking to "click on squares containing privacy violations"

God continues to allow new JS frameworks despite endless prayer

Medical startup struggles to hire full-stack doctors with 75+ years of experience

14% of energy consumption on Earth attributed to package managers installing other package managers

Expert says IoT and smart home devices are "very safe because they barely work anyway"

Hacker hacks into startup, rewrites complex backend with PostgreSQL and cron, forces CEO to fire 40% of devs and devops

U.S. Department of Health recognizes Webpack-related tasks as hazardous job; devs required to see therapist

JS devs don't believe colleague who claims browsers have native scrolling

Woman forgets why she exists after accepting cookies, denying notifications, rejecting newsletter, blocking location request and closing help chat

Touchscreen-operated Bluetooth printer/projector with Zoom integration declared Antichrist by Catholic Church

Janitor becomes front-end dev, decides to go back to old job after 4 months

Google reveals Fitbit Ankle Bracelet with "check in at Google HQ" feature

Google rewrites terms of service in language of Mordor after allegedly achieving quantum supremacy

New version of Slack supports VMs and containers inside chats

Cave painting dated 12000BC depict first LinkedIn invitation

Researchers create new filesystem to accommodate size of node_modules

VSCode releases AI-powered "recommended line of code" feature

Bot marks climate change issue as stale because it has not had recent activity

Google uses time travel to shut down product 2 weeks before initial idea

Programmer surprised name change is so difficult after naming his son "asdf"

Linux laptop user claims her life is flawless, then proceeds to list 48 health problems

C++ developer hears son's first word 'NaN', suspects adultery

Startup raises $133M to build ML/AI-powered AWS icon recognizer

Designer charged for malpractice, sentenced to select text on webpages 3 hours per day

Guy rewrites static site with React/GraphQL/AWS Lambda, successfully scales to 25 visitors per week

JAM-stack means "Just Attempt Moving off of our paid service"

Priest denies absolution to Brendan Eich for inventing JavaScript

Beginner installs all WordPress plugins, achieves quantum supremacy

Apache Kafka gifts its name to Webpack

NodeJS developer refuses to believe that gigahertz means billion hertz

Rust developers accused of Cargo cult

NoSQL fan hospitalized with alcohol poisoning after discovering PostgreSQL

Universal Server Side Rendering (USSR) takes industry by storm

WhatsApp considers removing words "Lucifer" and "Soul" from terms of service

BREAKING: Russia was found on Google Maps, FBI to investigate the product

Developers admit SSR stands for "Stockholm Syndrome Rendering"

Authors of "reproducible builds" promise "runnable software" by 2027

Apple Music for macOS review

Lawyers prohibit Google workers UNION, claim company is NoSQL

US DHS cracking down on undocumented DB migrations

NASA refuses to reply to aliens who attempted to communicate with Earth via YAML

Global productivity spiked during Slack downtime

Senior developer fired for insisting their pronouns are "sir/sir"

Haskell programmer attempts to live without side effects, found asphyxiated in black box

42.js: new JS framework aims to equalize build time and page load time at 42 seconds